Facelift
I suppose the first thing you would realise when you read my blog now is that I've just given it a new facelift. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely loved my previous old template, but I thought it's time for a little change. Just like my previous template, this current one is a simple one too. I prefer simple and plain templates that give me the liberty to thwart around and customise it to my own preferences. So yeah, it's my OWN template. Hope you like the change too. :)
Recently, I'm beginning to struggle with my choice of the current job I'm in. I mean, I'm not paid basic and I still have to spend long(and perhaps unnecessary) hours at the office before moving off to the roadshow locations each day. The worst part is I've been spending a huge part of my "ang bao" money or whatever left out of it on my travel and food expenses, as much as 10 plus per day. And I have not seen money coming in yet!! Argh. If I have to spend most days of my week for good exposure, I don't mind. But here I'm not earning anything. And there's still many unnecessary costs I need to pay if I don't hit the sales target. Ridiculous. Seriously, I'm now having second thoughts whether I should stay on for long. Or just quit as soon as possible. However, that means I have to start sending resumes again and hope for some treasure chest to fall from the sky or a treasure map for me to do my own exploring. Then again, it's just wishful thinking. Being in this job means if I want to see money coming in, I need to be skilful, crafty, and I have to strain my voice pretty much. And I already lost my voice 2 times in a row so far. =(
Anyway, I just came back from a heavy dinner at Tung Lok restaurant with my family, my uncle, aunt, cousin and my grandparents. My dad paid a total bill of $700 plus for the meal and he did not mind at all cos he said at least we all had a happy time together. And what he said was true. Money could never buy kinship or the closely-knit bonds that exist among us.
During the meal, had funny conversations with my family members, especially my sisters, who never failed to bring me down again and again. I heard people saying I have been living in my own world, and my boss who thought I lived in self-denial. Honestly speaking, I don't deny all that. I kept telling people I'm a born introvert. There are people who believed me right from the start. There are people I find hard to convince. As a matter of fact, I am! I am not ashamed to tell the whole world I am! But there's nothing wrong with being born an introvert right? It just happens so that I am innately introverted and soft-spoken. However, I'm learning to open myself to the extrovert's world as well, to grab two halves of the pie, to see two sides to a coin. It's very hard to step out of one's comfort zone to reach out to a more widened social circle. Ask any introvert and they will tell you that. However, I WANT to be the one shining example that introverts can do well in whatever they do too.
My sisters were speaking of my character, how I failed to appreciate others' effort, and failed to reciprocate what others have given me. Indeed, I find myself selfish in a sense that I give myself too much attention, thus foregoing on my outer circle-my friends who need support as well. This is especially to my best buddy. Thank you for always giving in to me, never failing to celebrate my birthday each year, there for me when I needed you, always sticking to me as your best friend, though we are poles apart in terms of our likings and hobbies. I may have taken your friendship for granted. But I don't mean it. If you have to blame, it has to be on my character. I really wish to do something about that, to shower you with more concern too. It just never crossed my mind that the usual happy-go-lucky you have your own problems as well. Sorry for overlooking them and not being able to be there when you needed someone to talk to.
Of course, this goes out to my circle of friends as well, whom I may have neglected in one way or another. Give me time to make up for you guys. After all, I may not be a perfect friend, but I believe that being friends are fate that we should lean on one another no matter what happens.
I guess there's no ending to learning, to improving one self in all aspects. Maybe it's time to stock my bookshelves with more self-help books. I always believe that the best asset that anyone could have is to have an open mind.
It's probably time to don on a clean new mask now.
1 comment:
I kind of like the changes. Pure shades are easy to adapt to.
As said, one wk plus is still too early to conclude. Much as the money is not a lot. Working purely on commission is pretty tough I admit, but as said, give it another wk or so. At least tts wat I think. U know the situation best. Dun be clouded by anybody's opinions and try to find the best way out for yrself. Maybe before u decide to leave, let yr boss, and yr job agent know. So u can leave well and get another job quickly.
I wont believe tt u are born introvert. Well forgive me, cos psych student and all. On the psch perspective, the most u can get is the genetic predisposition to be introverted. Its the envir tt triggers the actual behaviour. So both u being born, AND the envir, have a part to play. No one is EVER born with a confirmed trait. The envir moulds the genetic traits.
I believe tt introverts can do as well as they want and allow themselves to be. FYI, more than half the world is introverted(at least tts wat my fren said. I think its pretty true from my observations.). Its really hard to be an extrovert. And they tend to enjoy more successes cos they know how to make their mouth work well. Nonetheless, introverts are able to do well in their own abilities too. So work hard towards yr vision.
Its inevitable to neglect certain ppl sometimes, especially the one who are more distant (both literall and emotionally), and those who we see like so often, or even everyday.
It is good that u gave a verbal promise to be a better fren and not take ppl for granted. Of cos the practical action of cherishing is still the best remedy. I believe u know wat u shld and can do, so jia you. As for yr job, as said above, dun be clouded too much by what others say. Try to analyse ppl's comments and come up with the best solution. U know wat is best for u I believe, so make yr future the brightest as u can! :)
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