Went to my JC friend's bbq gathering just now as part of her birthday celebration. Didn't really enjoy myself at all, probably cos something happened prior to that. And I wasn't very happy with myself either. Was rather disappointed to know that only a few of my classmates came. Actually only 3 other than me. And all girls. So yeah, I was in a daze. And other than munching on the bbq food, I wasn't doing anything much else except openly "eavesdropping" on my female counterparts who are talking about relationship issues beside me on my left. And on my right, another with her boyfriend in their own world of lovey-dovey. I'm stuck in the middle.
Wished you were there.
Anyway, was thinking recently of how my friends they all were talking about uni campus life being so exciting, especially "hall" life. Looking at myself, I don't think I have a chance to experience that kind of fun since I won't be studying at NUS or NTU. Instead, I would be doing part-time studies and working at the same time. A part of me is envious of that kind of life, though I know I need to face it - I'm walking the mature path. I'm already stepping into adulthood in full gear. A part of me is screaming to break free. To have fun. But I have to think of my future and start saving up. I do hope fun comes in other ways. Perhaps in knowing new people along the way in various workplaces? But then, there's still a line of defence somewhere to be drawn. I can't trust anyone completely. Cos everyone's looking out for everyone else.
There's so much competition in the air it makes it so much denser and harder to breathe.
What remains now are the friends I have made in school. Not many too. I could probably wished to know more new acquaintances and develop into true friendships but what are the odds of that really happening? At this age, everyone is either busy with school or with their jobs. Only the weekends are open for socialising. And even so, everyone has his/her own schedule/appointments/dates. That is probably why I wished I could go back to school as in full-time study. And show people I'm not that much of a nerd I used to be.
If only I could travel back time. I would laugh out at my old self.
*****
Just bought Jason Mraz's latest album. THAT DUDE IS A GENIUS!!! Love his music, his songs, his melodies, his lyrics, his voice, his guitar-playing, his unplugged/aucostic performances. His new songs are absolutely pleasing to the ears. And very cool album cover as well.
Was at JP in the afternoon browsing through the computer games. Haven't been playing computer games for like years?! Ever since the advent of technology. Friendster and msn and whatever. Coming online is more like "virtual socialising". I forgot all about my long lost game-playing hobby. I didn't say I was a game addict. I liked strategy games. And building games. So I saw Command & Conquer The Last Decade bundled with Command & Conquer 3: Tiberian Wars and was really tempted to buy. I remember I saw the launch of Command & Conquer 3 at Shaw House somewhere last year. C&C3 first sold at around $70. Now, I saw it selling for around $50 only. I really wanted to get it man. And there's even a better deal. The Last Decade(12 previous C&C games) plus C&C3 only for around $74!! Maybe I should really get it.
Wait. Arghh. This month's budget is getting tight.
I WANT MY PAY SOON!!!
1 comment:
I dun think that there is need for concern whether you can stay in a hall or not. That is not the hallmark of uni life anyway. Need not feel so different from the other schs. and the fun will surely come in its own way :)
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