.::Multi-Colored-Dreams::.

Withdrawal Syndrome

So it turned out that I didn't go take the exam paper today. Quite expected actually. Though I tried to do some last minute mugging last night, but I guess it just really was not enough.

I could hardly focus. So many things been happening lately, and had taken a huge toll on my mood. And if you could have already guessed or know about me, I am a very emotional person.

I just couldn't stand it when my sister started accusing me of things like I am non-chalant towards family matters and stuff. All the quarrels and whatever did not make sense to me. While I know clearly that her judgements contained many flaws, I seriously did not bother to argue my way out. What's the point? It is just disappointing to know how your own sibling could think of you in a different way. As if she already know me that well. Oh please.

Mum's back at home, recuperating. I have been pretty worried previously, and couldn't focus much on my work. I guess my siblings did not know how much I really do care for her, and that how much she matters to me. Like do I need to say things out?

I hate it when people judge me by whatever flaws I had in the past. Face it. People do grow and change. If you refuse to see the change and just get stuck in your previous delusion of whoever you think I am, then I am seriously sorry, but you guys need to open your eyes bigger and just be more sensitive.

I guess all the laughters and talking escapades with them are pretty much a facade of some degree. I am just so disappointed.

Back to what happened today. I was feeling anxious and jittery over missing the paper, although I know the consequence is little or insignificant. Took a break by walking around town with Daniel, and later joined by Yvonne.

I guess dearie's right, that I really should start to get more organised.

But who can teach me how to organise my emotions properly?

I definitely need a breather.